From my very earliest memories, I knew my future sure.
My folks lived out in a filthy slum. I'd not be like they were.
I had 'er all planned out just so. I knew what I 'ud do.
I'd be the Cap'n of a Whalin' ship, with a 56 man crew.
I studied on it as hard as I could, and I couldn't learn enough.
I studied all about whalin' 'n' all about sailin' ships 'n' stuff.
I studied all through college. Whalin' life, that's for me.
I knew more about it than most sailors did and I'd never seen the sea.
I read lotsa books like "Moby Dick" and "20,000 Leagues Under the Sea"
Then I headed out to the ocean, a sailor soon to be.
But on my way to the Eastern Coast, I noticed my money was low.
So I stopped for a spell at a farmer's place, tryin' to make a little dough.
I'd stayed there plenty long enough. My money'd surely hold.
When I fell in love with the farmer's daughter, and I wouldn't leave there for gold.
Well, I figured I'd get married, then continue on my way.
But Mary had a different idea. She didn't want to go away.
"I'll tell you what", my Mary said, "We'll stay here just one year."
Well, I couldn't argue with a thing like that, so I said, "Well, OK, Dear."
So, I settled back into farmin'...I'd just be there a while.
And one bright morning, I left for the field, a distance of half a mile.
I loaded a load of hay by myself and started it up to the house.
But on the way, the horse, she shied. Was frightened by a small field mouse.
Well, the wagon pitched and off I fell. Along came my pitchfork, too.
The fork, she landed upside-down, and the tines went right straight through.
Now I can't walk and I can't shout. No way to get my wife,
And I'm dyin', a lousy farmer, and a pitchfork took my life.